Ho ho ho,

is near once again.That means it's time for some stuff. That stuff means some people are going to get a bit too worried, some a bit sad. Some are going to be hitting their year's peak while others hit the bottom. When night falls we see colored lights in home grown patterns. We smell cake and cookies all too often; we see pie and alcohol arrive like cousins. Wrapped in clothes or paper, what's the difference? All lacquered to the brim, veneers shinning bright. Still, we all kind of love the ridiculousness of it. Charity is an apron wearing, bell wielding coin collector. Commercialism is epitomized by an Obese old man in red fur. Yet we all kind of love him. Why? Because we are caught up in sickening and healing nostalgia. It must be getting close to christmas. Are we forgetting tho that it is supposed to be about something more?
I dont think so. I sometimes wonder if christmas really IS about Jesus. Not too say that it shouldnt be, or that it wasnt at some time. Now tho..is he the reason for the season, as so many neighbors signs proclaim. He should be, but if he isn't. At least we try to make it about giving and caring for others, key word here is try.What im saying is that i feel like christmas no longer is about Christ. It started out that way,but is no longer. Do we attempt to curve public opinion, do we have our own silent remembrances. How would we even celebrate such a momentous occasion? This isnt for or against our current holiday, i enjoy christmas to the fullest. Im simply thinking out loud, and making my thoughts semi public. Anyways, Happy christmas.

Listening to Bag End by Howard shore.
and He made a mess by Benjamin Lyman

Love aint a thing

Ive decided to do a few things. Im working out, and running. I dont want to get big or anything, but i want to be healthy. Im currently listening to "Born and Raised", John Mayer's latest album. I really like it. Unlike alot of music that makes me angry, or sad, this makes me really happy. Along with Howard shore's LOTR soundtrack, it makes me happy as well. I was thinking about a few things lately, such as being a fool and happy vs. being learned,educated and being cynical and hateful. Why is this often the case? Had I never learned to read would i still be the happy child i was before i grew to be the bitter person i am now? I enjoy listening to Born and Raised, and the soundtrack for The Shire, because it makes it feel better. Yes the world is stupid, and kind of pointless, but its beautiful in a simple way. We may have shinier horses, better plows, wood floors instead of dirt, tiled roof's instead of thatched ones; But we're no different than we were back then. We still work in our little circles, we strive to survive, to get food, to find pleasure, to find love. We still walk around and think ourselves high. Im only now starting to realize that it's funny rather than dumb. We are children in wearing adult clothing. Maybe those of us who realize that life's kinda silly, should strive to see it as such. A fun game worth maintaing. Im not getting my point across very well, but ill expound upon it later.

You have to look out your window at all the cars, running in their little circles; shake your head with a knowing smirk, and love them for it. Thats it.


When you gonna wise up boy, love is a verb

The Road goes ever on and on

Down from the door where it began.

Now far ahead the Road has gone,

And I must follow, if I can,

-Ian

Why do I, along with others, sing,write,talk,yell about suffering and hatred? It doesnt do anything does it. Couldnt my time be better spent looking for ways to eradicate this Disease called hate. My friend was complaining to me the other day, about how she never gets to sing on stage. She mentioned how unfair it was, and how unfairly she was being treated. She went on to say that the leader's are biased and dont like her as much as the others.
I stopped her and asked if she had mentioned any of this to The leader in charge of Scheduling. She said no. I told her,"If your not willing to do something about it, you have no right to complain about it."

Oh baby boy, get ready. Get ready for quite the ride. Tv, Books, Movies, Parents, Friends, Elders, Youngers, Shmucks, cowboys, and drivers have all built it up so well. They have created and constructed your set with such detail you dont know your living on one. Dont get me wrong, its ugly and horrible and by no means happy, but they know how to build a convincing world.
There's a catch though; its wrong.

What's out there and what you can make of it, isnt entirely up to you. Try as hard as you'd like and it really wont matter. Or maybe it will, Maybe it is entirely up to you. You dont have to be a doctor Or  lawyer or Civic engineer to be happy. Perhaps all that is needed for happiness and success is Effort and Love. A bit of passion, to give up on trying to be individual. If your special wont it manifest itself? Focus on building your self, not your self image.

wHO KNOWS

If i had 100 baby's and One cow, Would i eat the cow?
Interesting discussion tonight, very interesting. Human life and its value's based on ethics and morality. Do we need a God to maintain Objective Standards? Hmm hmm hm

Whats eating gilbert Grape

I watched that today, it put me in such a strange mood. Ive only felt that way Three other times. Once when i watched "I am Sam" I was in third grade i think. A second time when i watched "Radio" I was in Fifth Grade. Most recently when i finished reading "Of mice and men".

Pay us no mind

I thought i would write something,this, before i drown myself in the forgetfulness of social networking. I am sad, acutely felt sadness. A sharp sense of leaving, letting go of things i know now are special.

I went on a missions trip to england. Honestly, it was unlike anything ive been on previously and it surpassed every expectation i had set up beforehand. Meeting people who believed of their own will, when their parents wished they would believe otherwise. The scenery was breathtaking; I believed scenery such as that was no longer around. Modern expansion's Steel fingers left Camelford Untouched. After seeing the views and the sea, i can understand where Tolkien found inspiration to conjure up elves and Hobbits and magic. It is truly a place where you can still feel the remnants of a time gone by, where magic was thick and belief in it even denser.

More than any of the scenery or new friends,  i will miss those i went on the trip with most of all. They are truly people worth knowing, worthy of attention they will not get. I wish to live up to their expectations, so that i may give them credit. There are many things i wish i could change about our time together, but that is a moot point. With the time i am given, i refuse to squander. Carpe Diem. "Seize the day boys, make your lives' extraordinary". Be it a card on her windshield, or an invite to tea, I will seize the time i have left. Im sorry i Hurt people, im sorry i paid you no mind. Thats life tho, Im just your neighbor with 15 chickens, squawking away. Yet i am not home to pick up their eggs, so they lay rotting in my lawn.

-The Staves
 , Pay us no Mind.


May the stars watch over you, and peace live in your heart.

-Ian

Henry and a spritzer

Very often we allow our goals or ambitions to become substitutes for action.We allow Thinking to take the place of conversing. The knowledge of one's potential is enough to sate one's desire for greatness or achievement." I could'a  been at the top baby, but i jus' didnt want to be one of those people, ya know? Who dont spend any time enjoying life; music and writing arn't about forcing something to come, it has just gotta happen, like a wet dream, ya know? "

pardon that terrible example. Im just stuttering along here trying to say that we let our potential become our achievement. We do not achieve because we are pacified in telling ourselves that we COULD have done it. When our anger and disappointment begin to surface, we just layer on a thick cream of could have and eventually, we believe it. Our fear of failure, our fear of strange circumstance, keep us from trying.
We convince ourselves we could have, but didn't. We didnt fail because we weren't good enough but because we chose not to compete. A life lived on could have. Maybe you would have done something, maybe you would not have done something. I will never know unless i try.